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Ready, Steady, Catch Up! | Nov. 12

Hey everybody, we’re back again with another round-up of the weeks biggest Film TV news! but before we get started just wanted to say thank you to the team here at Ready, Steady, Cut! and you beautiful people for reading my ramblings on the latest nonsense in Hollywood. Without further ado, let’s get into it.

A Galaxy In Our Near, Near Future.

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So, right off the bat you might be thinking “Josh, who the hell is this guy with tiny glasses and an eerily perfect round head in the featured image?” (Seriously, that is a perfect sphere and it’s freaking me out). Well, that just so happens to be the future of Star Wars, Rian Johnson. The director of the forthcoming Star Wars installment, The Last Jedi, seems to have made such a huge impression on Lucasfilm and Disney that they’ve given him the keys to the Millennium Falcon for an entirely new trilogy separate from the Skywalker saga. This is massive, to say the least.

What this says to me is that they are so impressed with Episode 8 that before anyone has even seen it, Mickey Mouse just decided, “Hey, I like this guy, let’s invest eleventy billion trillion dollars in him and hopefully he can get some new glasses”. With that being said, I know I live to make fun of his tiny glasses but I actually like Rian a lot and happen to be a fan of Looper, so I’m excited to see what he brings to the table.

Furthermore, I think the future is in good hands. From the trailers it seems to me that he isn’t afraid to take risks, and while others may be afraid to take a step forward in fear of annoying one of the most loyal and easily disgruntled fanbases in the world, Rian seemingly brushes it off and can very likely change the way we look at the most iconic character in the series, Luke, before saying goodbye to this particular saga. I’m in. Punch it, Rian.

Do The Rights Thing

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Keeping up with Disney (which I would watch instead of Kardashians, make this happen). Rumours are swirling about them finally buying back the rights to X-Men and Fantastic Four from Fox. While fans have been dreaming of seeing Logan team up with the Avengers, or there finally being a good Fantastic Four movie (I loved Silver Surfer and I feel ashamed), not everybody is too happy about this possible team up. Deadpool’s creator is begging Disney not to do it for fear of destroying his onscreen character by making him more family friendly. While I appreciate the concern, this is the same Disney who gave us Daredevil, which was brutal and bloody and violent all in a neatly wrapped 12 episode season. They do happen to have a R-Rated movie studio under their umbrella, believe it or not, and I’m sure Deadpool would be in good hands.

Speaking of which, a Deadpool/Punisher crossover would be a feast for the eyes and ears and what have you. What I’m trying to say is, I want to watch Ryan Reynolds and Jon Bernthal beat the hell out of each other for my own amusement. Maybe throw in a few dick jokes, fourth wall breaking, and baby, we got a stew cookin’.

A Universe Goes Dark.

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In one of the biggest non-shockers in Hollywood history, Universal seems to have pulled the plug on their “Dark Universe”. After both Dracula Untold (should’ve stayed that way, am I right?) and The Mummy failed horribly in basically every aspect possible, they have decided to save themselves from embarrassment, and from further destroying the legacy these iconic movies and characters have made. At first I loved the idea of it, but in practice it just didn’t measure up. They rely too heavily on big name actors and over the top special effects; Universal seems to have forgotten what made these stories so great in the first place. Oh well, better luck next time.

Justice League might actually be alright.

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Speaking of universes that have no business still kicking around. Early buzz for Justice League has started spreading and the general consensus seems to be that, “It’s not perfect, but its fun and entertaining”. Which actually sounds like every Marvel film after Captain America: The Winter Soldier. My hopes have never been higher. I don’t remember the last time a DC film was described as “fun”. Everyone is just sad and bummed out all the time after Christopher Nolan made it cool.

Hint: that only works for Batman.

Can you smell what Black Adam is cooking?

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On that note, word has it that Dwayne Johnson’s Black Adam will be making his appearance in Suicide Squad 2 aka The Fast and the Furious of the DCU. Think about it. I hate how accurate that is. Anyway, I’m actually looking forward to this after it was teased so long ago. Dwayne brings a certain energy to every project he is a part of. Although, I do believe the film would succeed regardless, Harley and Joker are such a marketing machine now that the film will sell on their inclusion alone.

Men in Hollywood are still creeping.

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As if things couldn’t get any more depressing than a DCU film. I, somehow, still have to bring up the fact that every single famous man on the planet sucks. Except for Barack Obama, apparently. The aftermath of Kevin Spacey’s dark past keeps making headlines; 6 weeks from its release, All the Money in the World is straight up replacing Kevin with Christopher Plummer. Six. Weeks. However, it apparently is only 10 minutes of screen time which is way less impressive, so I’m sorry for getting your hopes up. Just a regular ol’ reshoot and not some miracle from the movie gods.

Anyway, as I’m writing this I couldn’t decide on who to mention next. Whether its Louis C.K. or George Takei or Brett Ratner or Grimace from McDonald’s. That being said, I won’t go into a long spiel about it, instead I’ll just say this: I’m not sad people I admired are scumbags. In fact, I’m sad for the victims of this abuse and I’m simply just disappointed in these men. We can all do better and be better. As Patton Oswalt beautifully said in his latest Netflix special, “It’s chaos. Be kind”.

(Note: Living up to the name of her most iconic character, Gal Gadot has said she won’t return for Wonder Woman 2 unless Brett Ratner is completely excised from the franchise.)

Lucky Logan Laura.

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In other news, Logans director James Mangold is working on a spinoff for Laura which I feel might be the most unneeded and also very needed semi-sequel. The X-Men timeline is so off the rails now. I just hope we get at least 8 more movies from random time periods to further confuse non-comic reader audiences. We’ve been needing a good, old-fashioned western involving Toad and, like, Skin. Skin is an X-Man whose only power is that he has 6 extra feet of skin that he can manipulate and is kinda better than regular skin and he was eventually crucified. I assume for being the worst character ever invented. Yes, yes, I know, we kinda got off topic – this is news and not bad X-Men backstories.

If you like what you’ve read from me so far, feel free to find me on twitter @prostisushi and scream into the internet abyss with me or just talk about movies. I like knowing what people are watching so I can judge you accordingly!

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