Fran and Jamie get outdoorsy in “Woods”, making for a slightly meandering episode that’s a bit of a step down after the first two.
This recap of Hitmen season 1, episode 3, “Woods“, contains spoilers. You can check out our thoughts on the previous episode by clicking these words.
“Woods” is an episode that had the potential to be much better, but stands out as the weakest of Hitmen thus far. It has two competing subplots. In the first, Jamie and Fran are tasked with killing a bouncer (Anthony Adjekum) who slept with Mr. K’s latest trophy bride — while they’re digging his shallow grave, he makes an escape attempt in the van, crashes it, and escapes deeper into the woods. In the second, Jamie decides that she’s ready to have a baby, so Fran gives her a boiled egg to look after for 24 hours as a responsibility exercise.
Hitmen episode 3 splits Fran and Jamie up for a while, which seems like a mistake. Fran fancies herself a bit of a survivalist and has various rules for the wilderness, none of which work, and none which Jamie follows; she instead continues to fuss her egg and decorates it so that it looks distressingly like Hitler. She also thinks the Bouncer is hunting them.
Eventually, the two run into eerie symbols in the woods that they suspect witches of having made. Fran gets so hungry that she tries to eat Jamie’s egg, and both start going around in circles. Eventually, the Bouncer, thoroughly protected against bugs, which he’s terrified of, stumbles on them both. Jamie shoots at him as he flees and steps in a trap while Fran finds herself taken in by a group of young girl Guides who ply her with homemade granola. She gets dressed up in their shirt and sash and becomes an honorary member as Jamie continues to struggle with the target.
Hitmen season 1, episode 3 only runs for twenty minutes, like the others, but it feels much longer. Eventually, Jamie finds Fran with the girls, who lead them through a resolution of their minor quibbles. Jamie makes Fran eat her egg as a gesture that she’s past that baby stuff, and the Guides applaud when they hug. Fran and Jamie enlist their help in pulling the van out of a ditch, and they catch a lucky break as they drive home: The find the Bouncer wandering alone, covered in bug bites, and run him over. Mission accomplished.
Jonathon is the Co-Founder of Ready Steady Cut and has been Senior Editor and Chief Critic of the outlet since 2017.