M.N. Miller’s Film Year in Review: The Worst Films of 2021

January 2, 2021
M.N. Miller 0
Film, News, Ranked

The Worst Films of 2021

No, it’s not deja vu. It has been another rough year. There have been some gloriously steaming piles of pure garbage along the way to take our minds off our circumstances for another year. Here is a list of my Top 10 worst films of 2020. Please, don’t say I didn’t warn you about them.

10a. Here Today

Remember when a Billy Crystal comedy was an event? Here Today takes on a too cumbersome subject for his skill set. The matter of dementia isn’t handled with any insight, and we only see a flash of his legendary comic talents in a brief scene that’s oddly out of place.

10b. The Humans

The only thing genuinely horrifying about The Humans (besides the hideous bathroom and a new way to use duct tape) is how harrowing the experience is to sit through while the characters react in a way that is completely unrealistic when it comes to the four kinds of basic emotions such as fear, sadness, anger, or even happiness. The only thing The Humans evokes is viewer indigestion and indignation.

9. Infinite

With so many past lives to choose from, the filmmakers of Infinite still repeated the same mistakes when there should have been limitless possibilities. Instead, it’s an endless exercise in suspense-free filmmaking.

8. The Starling

The Starling is a manipulative cinematic therapy session equivalent to treating depression with a Flintstones vitamin. The wrong blend of comedy and drama.

7. Chaos Walking

Chaos Walking is nothing but a stagnant and boring sci-fi adventure film that’s nothing but “exposition” in the not-too-distant future.

6. Space Jam: A New Legacy

I’ll get right to the point. Space Jam: A New Legacy is nothing but a giant infomercial for its legendary studio, Warner Brothers. We know that because Don Cheadle’s Al G. Rhythm tells us almost immediately. Several times. While the sight of King Kong and The Iron Giant giving each other a fist bump will have a special place in my heart, the rest of the film is just looney.

5. Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard

An example of sequel overreach. Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard is a feverishly forced, unpleasant, poorly written, sloppily edited action film that delivers very few thrills. The overwrought attempts to have a relentless amount of jokes that miss the mark don’t help.

4. The Misfits

Leave it to Renny Harlin to throw a twist on the action caper comedy by having a handful of millennial and Gen-Z do-gooder wannabes play Robin Hood by stealing money for a charity that’s full of downright borderline racist stereotypes. Then, finally, the infamous bloated action director’s latest movie, The Misfits, is as stomach-turning as it is patronizing. It also happens to be painfully unfunny.

3. Every Breath You Take

This is a remarkably dull and self-absorbed 90s inspired thriller with a twist that’s so blatantly obvious it can only inspire a response from the viewer, “Well, duh.” The script is shockingly bad, and you have to wonder how Every Breath You Take made it to a movie studio production.

2. Tom and Jerry

You know a movie is wrong when the best comment you can give is that it got rid of that era’s 1930’s penchant for offensive racial stereotypes and the despicable use of blackface as entertainment— unfortunately, that’s not saying much.

The new HBO Max film of the week is Tom and Jerry, and it’s painfully bad. Woefully bad. I know there is something to say about not every movie is made for you or me, but this? If anyone should know the ins and outs of this duo, it’s Warner Brothers. This cartoon’s target audience seems to be tailored for those unique children whose medication has little to no effect on their attention deficit disorder.

1. Kitty Love: An Homage to Cats

“I thought, maybe I’ll just quit,” was a line said by Gene Siskel almost thirty-some-odd years ago on one of David Letterman’s late-night incarnations. He said it after watching the Tony Danza film She’s Out of Control— which was a comedy starring the Who’s the Boss star having fantasies about his daughter.

I’ve never seen it, but it has to be a classic compared to Kitty Love: An Homage to Cats, a film that I can only hope was made because of limited Dutch film availability over the pandemic. If not, my best guess is the owner and operators of Ready Steady Cut are running a behavioral study on obedience.

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