The Neighborhood season 3, episode 8 recap – “Welcome to the Property”

By Jonathon Wilson
Published: January 26, 2021 (Last updated: February 9, 2021)
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The Neighborhood season 3, episode 8 recap - "Welcome to the Property"
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Summary

Calvin tries to befriend his mortal enemy in “Welcome to the Property” simply to keep the neighborhood’s charm. Needless to say, he has mixed results.

This recap of The Neighborhood season 3, episode 8, “Welcome to the Property”, contains spoilers.


For once, The Neighborhood follows a single narrative arc in “Welcome to the Property”. While it’s usually divided into A and B plots, the singular focus here is thanks to the show reaching something of a turning point, with a climax that’ll slightly alter the dynamic going forward — or at least probably will.

The hook is that Calvin’s nemesis neighbor, Walter, is moving and selling his property to a development group that intends to knock it down and build what will inevitably be an eyesore in its place. This gives the Butlers an excuse to rather awkwardly explain how gentrification works in the least natural way possible, and Calvin decides he has to charm Walter in order to convince him not to sell.

This is ripe enough territory for gags, but The Neighborhood season 3, episode 8 quickly shifts focus. After Walter comes over for dinner and can’t help but be awful to everyone present, including Dave and Gemma, Calvin finally just asks him outright not to sell. Walter has no interest in playing along, so Calvin proposes finding him another buyer and getting him more money in the sale, which Walter is willing to consider as long as they put him up in a hotel while they renovate and host an open house.

Naturally, Walter’s house is in a state, so we get a whole montage of everyone cleaning it up. They do a great job aside from some minor niggles such as a detached mantle, a closet filled with junk, and a hole in the wall. But that’s easily covered up for the duration of an open house in which Gemma and Dave play an enthusiastic couple who noisily promise to put an offer in straight away. Needless to say, it’s a disaster, all the flaws are exposed, and all the potential buyers flee.

A smug Walter returns in The Neighborhood season 3, episode 8, and is perfectly happy to sell to the developers. But when Marty expresses a desire to live there himself, and Malcolm offers to move in with him, Calvin has a better idea and offers to buy the house himself for his sons to live in. Their rent will cover the mortgage, Malcolm will be out of the house, and Walter will be gone to his singles retirement community that’s 70% women, and where his two working hips and all his teeth will make up for his lack of game. Everyone’s a winner. But for how long?

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