‘Christmas Wedding Planner’ | Film Review Stooltide

1.5

Summary

Christmas Wedding Planner is an uplifting seasonal reminder that even the most implausibly beautiful people can be utterly talentless just like you.

One of the advantages of being a senior editor is that I often get to make volunteers spend ninety minutes watching something I know they’re going to hate. Unfortunately that isn’t always a viable approach, and in times of strife it sometimes falls to me to wade into the trenches and get my own hands covered in seasonal slop like Christmas Wedding Planner, which arrived on Netflix today.

As far as I’m aware Christmas Wedding Planner was made for TV, arrived there last year, and was rightly ignored by everyone. Yet ‘tis the season for Netflix to stuff their stockings full of cheap tat for the extended family, so here we are.

The titular wedding planner is Kelsey (Jocelyn Hudon), an extremely good-looking and admittedly very charming young lady who is organising the holy union of her extremely good-looking cousin Emily (Rebecca Dalton) and her extremely good-looking but quite obvious lecherous fiancé Todd (Eric Hicks). Things are going rather smoothly until the arrival of Connor (Stephen Huszar), an extremely good-looking private investigator (and Emily’s ex!) who has been hired by a mysterious source to determine if Todd is up to no good.

This is one of those movies which superimpose text messages on-screen to let everyone know it’s hip and modern, but it’s also the kind of movie in which those messages don’t entirely fit in the frame so half the text is missing. Kelsey is really lovely and I wish she was in a better film, but she also acts to her own internal monologue like someone else is speaking the words to her, so I can’t help but hate her and wish her misery.

That’s unfortunate, because Christmas Wedding Planner doesn’t traffic in misery, no matter how impossibly it has to contort itself in order to contrive a wonderfully happy ending after Connor predictably wins Kelsey’s sweet and innocent heart. It isn’t a spoiler to say that happens – this is, after all, a made-for-TV Christmas movie – but the exact circumstances are so insultingly stupid that I’ll leave you to discover them on your own.

There are, apparently, people who like these things, and if you’re one of those people you have my condolences. I also wouldn’t want to put you off Christmas Wedding Planner unnecessarily. Perhaps consult a more trusted source for a proper verdict, and if the mystery of Todd’s potential infidelity is riveting enough for you to spend 90 minutes of your life unravelling it, more power to you. Me? I hope Kelsey and Connor don’t last.

Jonathon Wilson

Jonathon is the Co-Founder of Ready Steady Cut and has been Senior Editor and Chief Critic of the outlet since 2017.

10 thoughts on “‘Christmas Wedding Planner’ | Film Review

  • November 15, 2018 at 7:29 pm
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    This review should have been read by me and published by you prior to me wasting time on this. I could potentially see its loopholes and it has major ones apart rom stilted acting but I guess I was hoping for some saving grace. It was too much to hope for.

    Reply
    • November 15, 2018 at 7:30 pm
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      Ah, I did try to get it out sooner! My condolences!

      Reply
  • November 16, 2018 at 6:37 am
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    Two minutes left in the movie and I am frantically searching google for a review. Its your typical hallmarkish christmas movie with predicatable storey line, and I am not even bothered by that, they are my guilty pleasure! What I am bothered by is that ending! *********Spoiler Alert********* He proposes? Like really? And she says yes! Ugh im so annoyed right now.

    Reply
  • November 18, 2018 at 9:19 pm
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    This movie is so ridiculously bad! Cartoons have a more realistic action. Through it all, everyone acts bad, except for Kelly R, which acts Like a prima Donna. Nothing makes sense; moreover , after the ending proposal; that comes out of the blue. I must have missed it when he explained why he took the money the first time, when he broke up with his ex. Either that, or it was not mentioned.

    Reply
  • November 20, 2018 at 4:42 pm
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    Im 26min into the movie and it’s so cringy that I had to look for a review

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  • November 21, 2018 at 3:30 am
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    OMFG. I don’t even want to put a spoiler alert. It’s so bad you can predict it from like two minutes before. But let me just say… this entire ending is a great example as to why the divorce rate in America is about 50%. Because after only knowing someone for LESS than a week, they confess that they love one and have a shotgun wedding. Gross. I usually love Hallmark movies, but that’s the only thing about them I cannot stand. Ugh.

    Reply
  • November 21, 2018 at 6:43 pm
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    This might actually be the worst movie ever made. For real! And this review made me laugh out loud.

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  • November 22, 2018 at 6:28 am
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    The single WORST movie I’ve ever watched! My bestie and I indulge in sappy Christmas movies but this had us roaring with laughter…but not the good kind…we were laughing AT the movie???
    Seriously this was a Jr high production written by a cynical preteen boy to mock his sister I’m sure of it!

    Reply
  • November 27, 2018 at 3:38 am
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    LOL! Spot on. The review was more entertaining than that flick.

    Reply

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