Tell Me Your Secrets season 1, episode 5 recap – what happened in “I Got Here By Myself”?

By Daniel Hart
Published: February 19, 2021
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Amazon series Tell Me Your Secrets season 1, episode 5 - I Got Here By Myself
3.5

Summary

“I Got Here By Myself” steps up the stakes as more secrets are revealed, and the search for Karen Miller is reaching a conclusion.

This recap of Amazon’s Tell Me Your Secrets season 1, episode 5, “I Got Here By Myself” contains spoilers.

As we enter Episode 5 of Tell Me Your Secrets Season 1, we understand each character’s motive. The series is playing a theme that there’s a demon buried inside each character. “I Got Here By Myself” opens with a flashback; Esther visits Emma in prison. She was a great mother to Emma. In the present day, Emma remembers their warm conversation with each other. Her eyes well up as she throws her medication out of the car window before arriving in Minnesota.

John tries out a suit for the funeral

The longer Mary and John work together, the weirder it gets. Mary visits him, and he’s annoyed that he didn’t show up to a meeting. John calls her rude, and tells her she reminds him of his mother. John asks Mary what her plan is once she meets Karen, and wonders if she does believe that they can become the best versions of themselves. At Esther’s funeral, Peter is there, and he sees John on the condolences list. Emma isn’t there, so John rings Mary and gives her an update — he also wants assurances of what Mary she will do when meeting Karen Miller. Mary makes a threat about his parole, but John brushes it off.

Emma visits her daughter

Emma meets a young girl in Minnesota and meets her daughter in a residential area. It’s an emotional moment as they talk about kittens. As the little girl gets her adoptive mother, Emma walks away, wiping the tears from her eyes. She has a young, lovely daughter, and she cannot have her.

Peter tells his story

“I Got Here By Myself” finally confirms why Peter comes across as an odd, suspicious character — he tells his story.

Peter finds Emma, and she pushes him away. He is adamant that he’s trying to help her. Emma demands to know everything; Pete promises to tell her everything if she turns the truck off. He admits to being a counselor at St Jerome’s House; he got close to a girl there, and they had a connection, but nothing happened. However, when the state found out he helped this girl run away, he lost his job. He then reveals that this girl is his wife when they reconnected years later.

Emma finally trusts him and lets him in the truck. This sounds like a definite grooming story.

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Chewing gum like his mother

Tell Me Your Secrets season 1, episode 5 sees the peak of Mary and John’s business relationship take a sour turn. John tells Mary that he’s getting closer to finding Karen Miller. Mary feels like John is playing games with her and wants to see Karen by the end of the day. John grabs Karen by the throat and tells her to swallow the gum and stop chewing it like his mother. Mary tells him to get out of her car. She then researches John’s rape victims on the internet. Mary fears John now and goes to a store to buy a gun.

Emma wants her daughter back

Emma tells Peter that she came back to get her little girl. A flashback occurs when Emma is in labor in the middle of the snow. Esther finds her and helps her give birth. She named her daughter Freya, and she fell in love with her straight away. In the present day, Emma tells Peter that she doesn’t know who she is without Freya. Peter tells her there’s a right way to do this, and that he will help her, but he needs her to keep it together. In the distance stands John; he’s found Karen Miller. He knocks on the truck door and looks at the kitten.

Everyone’s world is slowly merging.

The ending

Rose misses Emma, so she goes to her home and tries on her clothes, and spends time in the place. Police officer Tom heads to the place and leaves a note. Rose reads it, and it says, “I do want you” — this makes Rose freak out and trash the place. Meanwhile, John rings Mary, and he tells her that Karen Miller did not show. John then mentions Andrea Black, and it stops Mary in her tracks. He tells her that he knows what she did. The chapter closes with Mary practicing using her new gun. Emma returns to her truck and notices her kitten’s collar is gone.

Tell Me Your Secrets season 1, episode 5 steps up the stakes as more secrets are revealed, and the search for Karen Miller is reaching a conclusion.

Additional points
  • Rose’s father tries to figure out what is up with Rose. She’s hiding in her bedroom. Rose goes out for lunch with her father, and he calls her special.

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